Don't blink, but you'll still miss it

The coming weeks will see me do something I've never done before - travelling for work. Next week I'm off to Christchurch and Queenstown, but next month I will be going to Sydney for a one day training session. I've been in Sydney once before - on my way back from Cairns last year. We sat in the airport for a few hours and I saw the tower in Sydney from a distance.

I thought that I might get to see some of the city this time, but alas. I am flying in the night before, will be transferred to the hotel (which is by the airport), go to the training all of the following day (next to hotel), eat and sleep as my body will still be on NZ time and I have no transport, then fly out the next morning. So, no time for even a harbour bridge or opera house sighting. No airpoints either, as I've never flown on an expensive enough flight to earn them before and I don't want to pay the $50 joining fee now. Unless I can swing a business class flight, after which I can get free airpoints membership (the chances of this are, however, low). Anyway. This will be my first overseas trip by myself, as I'm the only NZ person represented at this thing. Hopefully it all goes smoothly.

Kiwi conquers Everest on artificial legs

New Zealand climber Mark Inglis last night stood at the highest point on the planet as he became the first double amputee to conquer Mt Everest.

His wife, Anne, confirmed her husband's achievement as she spoke to him briefly after he stood atop the 8850m mountain.

"He's incredible," Mrs Inglis said. "He's dreamed of this all his life, probably. He's over the moon.

"They didn't expect to be this early, they thought maybe mid to late May, so Mark will be stoked. I imagine they'll be having a few whiskies."

Inglis conquered Everest on two carbon-fibre artificial legs especially adapted for climbing.

He snapped one of them when he was at about 6400m while preparing to move up to Camp 2, which is at about 7500m.

He was able to fix it well enough to get to his climbing companions, and then rebuilt it with spare parts.

The 47-year-old arrived at Base Camp on April 7. He made his bid for the top with an early-morning start in perfect weather from Camp 4 - less than 450m below the summit.

Mrs Inglis said she talked to her husband briefly at 9.20pm, but there was static on the phone line and it cut out.

But she had heard from the partner of Wayne Alexander, another climber on the expedition, that the group had conquered Everest, were in high spirits and had returned to Camp 4. "I'm relieved the worst bit's over and feel great to know that he's done it."

She said she also spoke to her husband on Saturday and he had sounded confident and ready for the final push.

"He said he wouldn't call again until they had been to the top."

Mrs Inglis said she expected her husband home early next week. "It will be interesting to see what he wants to do now. He can't go any higher."

The original expedition party split into two groups. Four members of the first group had already reached the summit before Inglis made it to the top.

Inglis arrived in Tibet on April 1 and spent a week acclimatising before beginning the long haul up Everest.

On April 29 he wrote on his website that he was still struggling with acclimatisation. "Just when you think you can breathe, it takes two stops to get to the loo."

In November 1982, Inglis, then a mountain rescue guide, lost his legs to frostbite in a climbing mishap.

A blizzard trapped him and countryman Phil Doole in an ice cave on Mt Cook for 14 days.

Both had their legs amputated below the knees.

Sir Edmund Hillary and Sherpa Tenzing Norgay first conquered Everest, on May 29, 1953.

~NZ Herald

Jury duty farce

I knew as soon as I looked at the envelope from the Ministry of Justice addressed to my husband, that he had been called up for jury duty. Sure enough, when he opened it the words "JURY SUMMONS" were printed in menacing bold print at the top of the letter. Well, maybe he will be able to get out of it because of work, we thought.

Reading the contents further, we discovered that when on jury duty (which usually takes a week or longer) you are paid a measly $60 a day. That's NZ$ folks. How on earth are you supposed to survive on that when you have hundreds of dollars of financial commitments each week? Taking annual leave is out of the question. We're praying that they will accept a letter from his boss and excuse him from the duty.

This is just another example of government stupidity. If they paid your wages as normal, then you would just have the inconvenience of getting behind at work or finding a temporary replacement for your role. You could put up with that and willingly serve. But to put you at such a disadvantage is just a disgrace. I wonder how they get anyone in full time employment to serve at all. I suppose they just use the iron fist and make them. Typical.

Goldfish wanders 2km from pond

A chubby wee goldfish dubbed Nemo was miraculously found 2km from his Mosgiel pond after he was washed away by floodwater last Wednesday.

A neighbour was walking his dog along a road on Sunday morning when he saw a flash of gold in a mud-walled ditch.

As a farmer collected eels stranded by the flood on a nearby paddock, the man and his dog stopped to see the colour in the mess.

He recognised it as his neighbour's 2-year-old goldfish, one of three lost when the devastating Taieri flood rushed through their properties, and all along the road.

"It was just incredible, in the middle of all that destruction was a goldfish everyone thought was dead - that should have been dead," Ab Oskam said yesterday.

"He had been taken away by that horrible brown water, and there he was, about 2km away, swimming in the debris and happy as can be."

Mr Oskam, 66, made the long walk home to tell neighbours Julie and Craig Struthers that a "little surprise" waited down the road.

"We couldn't believe it, it was like a miracle, that such a delicate wee thing could survive the flood and all the rubbish caught in it," said Mrs Struthers.

"All of our other animals managed to survive, but we were sure that our three goldfish would never be back."

The trio returned to the ditch, where the newly named Nemo was scooped to safety and taken to the pond, lined with polythene rescued from the debris, back home.

Mr and Mrs Struthers then fruitlessly searched neighbouring ditches for his two companions - another coloured orange, and one white and blue-black.

The fish remained the only casualties in a menagerie of 12 sheep, nine hens, seven rabbits, two dogs, a cat and a pig - many helped to safety by Mr Oskam on the day of the flood.

Pleased to have added to the collection, Mr Oskam said Nemo seemed as well as he was before the flood; but, even after a 2km swim, he might have put on some weight. "He must have spent all that time eating the worms caught in the flood," Mr Oskam said.

- OTAGO DAILY TIMES